Sunday, February 7, 2010

and so I digress...er...regress...

Sooo I tried the Tim Hortons breakfast "Samich" on an english muffin and it honestly kicked the McMuffin...in the muff? Highly recommend. Actually, if we are on the topic of breakfast "samiches" the biggest thing I miss about being uptown on the daily is Java Moose. Their bacon n egg on a faccotia (yes I am such a bad speller that the checker won't pick up my guess) is delightful.

I was a Winter Spectator Extraordinaire (coinin and capitalizin) yesterday. Yup. True story. Hockey boys are cute right? Lily Lake was colder than you know what. Considering I had literally no sleep the night before I think that was a good thing.

Well, and while we are on THAT topic, I do think this is worth mentioning. So picture this. Local pub. Sober. Packed. The crowd was um, unsavory? to say the least. ANYWAY - watchin some chill live tunes (key word is chill) These two intensely intoxicated "chix" were trying to make out with the singer. Like tongue kiss. While he was performing! I don't really get awkward but I couldn't watch. We's be ridin dirty tonight! My Wing-woman went to point out (like literally) to "chix" that one was about to trip over a chord (in her 5 inch Payless special) and of course they thought we were bitchin them out. I guess we secretly WERE, but really we didn't want her to fall (well actually, I did, but my friends are a lot nicer than me) Then it got really awkward cause I thought there was gonna be a fight... there wasn't.

The night progressed. I don't wanna get into the "deets" but it sorta ended with Winger looking me dead in the face (not eye) and giving the best advice I have received to date: "Remember he's drunk and you're classy" Now for those of you who don't know the actual story this probably leads you in a direction I don't want you to take. The "drunk" is not really a random. There's a story however none the less, I left classy.

So after all that, why no sleep? I got home at 3, and then couldn't get my gosh darned boot off. It took the better part of 30 minutes to "kick" it off. Then I was so hyped up over my personal victory (ahem, and not with the boot) I didn't go to sleep till 5am. I don't wanna say FML but F-M-L....

So yes, tired, cold, hockey. Winter Spectator Extraordinaire. My favorite part was when this dude referenced using his "cup" to serve guacamole in for the Superbowl. So sick. So funny. Funnier is the entire "situation" There is so much I could say in reference to "the situation" however the Internet is not known for keeping secrets. Howwwever, let me just put this out there: It ain't no secret - THE GIG IS UP (or wait is it, JIG?)

On the subject of keeping secrets...I really gotta learn to shut the eff UP. Sometimes too much info is just too much info...mystery is not my specialty. Why do I feel the need to throw EVERYTHING out there but then not REALLY throw ANYTHING out there? That thought, mixed with freezing ass cold made me thirsty. Really thirsty.

Onto the next event. Curling. Multiple beverages. Very exciting - spectating that is. Spent the better part of the night making fun of this poor girl with a very unfortunate sweater....and face. Hell is gonna be so much fun. I mean I was really laughing with her. I have many unfortunate "uniforms" and faces...hmm.... Spent the other half of the night discussing the unfortunate social folly that is THE tramp stamp. This will be another blog entirely.

I'm not sure how to wrap this all up. My take aways from the past few days are:

1. Tim Horton trumps Ronald McDonald wit da egg burgers.
2. I'm classy
3. I will no longer purchase high boots that are not equipped with zippers
4. Body language. Social queues. Sometimes the eyes are louder than the mouth.
5. #4 is not supposed to be profound. If you think it is, never talk to me again, or what I really mean is date me. Or what I really mean is.....
6. Any article of clothing that has a duck and/or tree's and/or looks like it fit you 5o lbs ago is not cool. Just don't do it. Thats what I really mean.

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