Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Never Trust a Fat Dietician

I noticed the other day that an alarming number of "engineers" end their correspondences with "Cheers". I agree, it is better than "Regards" but strange it seems to be that grouping in particular. Especially considering the breed is not known for being particularly Cheery. I kid of course. Some of my favies are of this profession, but it must be a cult thing.

I also am noticing right now that Sean Kingston looks like one of those creepy marionette puppets. I also had a nightmare that involved Miley Cyrus the other night. Achy Breaky Heart was playing in the background. There is something about her lips that give me the willies. No joke. While we are on the subject, if I hear that Already Gone song one more time (by Kelly Clarkson) I am going to rip out my own eye lashes.

Speaking of eye lashes, one of my favorite friends gave me a gift certificate for eye lash extensions the other day. Decadence is my specialty. If you have ever seen these done they are wickedly awesome, and NO they don't make ya look like that chick from Drew Carry. This same girl gave me a new bikini. I made the mistake of wearing it while on the elliptical. Will not do that again. It felt like a good idea at the time....

I woke up with a stomach ache this morning. I think the four cups of coffee aggravated the situation...maybe it's the fucking swine flu. If I hear ONE more thing about H1N1 I am going to vomit. Sometimes society needs to just chill OUT. We get so flapped up over stuff we know nothing about. I mean something tells me the average Saint Johner knows dick shiz about this. Their Aunt said its gonna give em ADHD and it all goes to heck. When it is my turn, I'll probably be in line. I doubt we would be shootin up the Pregs if it was seriously dangerous. I also find it mildly amusing that the same people who "are not injecting themselves with the dangerous substance" are the same people who eat pre packaged everything and socially smoke. Think about it people.

I am craving a grilled cheese. Ooh nothing better than a buttery grilled cheese made with real cheddar with some tomato soup and a sliced apple. I might also make those cookies....but first lets try on that bikini again....

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